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Image by Drew Beamer
19. Irina_Ustyugova Art 1.JPG


She had not known the weight of the world until she had experienced her first taste of freedom. Freedom, that intangible word. New beginnings were calling out to her, this time she would not be tamed; the spirit within her could not, would not, be bridled. The trials of life that had once burdened her soul, convincing her she was never enough, bogging her down with tiresome worries, those days, she was leaving behind. She needed to be stretched by new experiences, as each and every curious fibre in her body sought an abundance of adventures. She was an independent, strong woman with a lust for life. This woman, who still sparkled and radiated warmth, even though she had suffered years of coldness and indifference. She dreamt and yearned for freedom. On her quest she descended, momentarily, into fleeting flickers of madness, but through the chaos in her mind, she still held a glimmer of magic. Her wick was just dampened for a while waiting to be reignited. Then, when it sparked, gloriously, she transformed into herself again. She rose from the flame like a phoenix. She was whole! She dazzled to all those she met along her way. Her cherished journey will lead to beautiful beginnings in the end. Of that, I am certain. Uncaged and free. She needed to lose herself for a while in the wilderness, to find and reclaim herself once more.


19. Irina Ustyugova Art 2. The portrait found in the ocean in the shipwreck.jpg


Don’t look at me with your eyes,

Then judge the way I feel.

Don’t take me to a place

Where my hate for love feels real.

Why won’t you look at me, just love me

For the roads I’ve travelled down.

The roads of troubled highways that have led me to this town.

I feel like you are drifting,

Like a raft on open sea.

I’m standing on this shoreline

Wanting you to confide in me.

You touch me with your hands,

Which warms my fragile heart.

You tease me with your words

Of hope, then wish that we’re apart.

Why can’t you look at me, just love me

For the roads I’ve travelled down.

The roads of troubled highways

That have led me to this town.

This love is lost and broken,

Like a shipwreck sunk at sea.

I’m still waiting on the shoreline

Praying you will return to me.

Today, it’s finally out there,

The ugly truth is there, in bold.

You’ve erased me from your memory,

Left me blindsided in the cold.

Now I’m standing at a crossroads 

Facing forwards, feeling free

The highways ahead calling out my name, 

There’s still a wild journey waiting for me.


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